


Telling Secrets

by misslucy21



Category: Star Trek: Deep Space Nine
Genre: Actual Good Parents Keiko and Miles O'Brien, Discussing "curing" Non-neurotypical character, Discussing DNA with a six year old, Gen, Genetic Engineering, Julian's parents remind me of Autism Mommies, Kid Fic, Not Neurotypical!Julian Bashir, Post-Episode: s05e16 Doctor Bashir I Presume, chosen family, internalized ableism
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-18
Updated: 2019-05-18
Packaged: 2020-03-07 14:22:10
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,985
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18874969
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/misslucy21/pseuds/misslucy21
Summary: How do you explain genetic engineering to a six year old?





	Telling Secrets

 

“Molly, we have a grown up thing to talk to you about. Everyone is okay, it’s not a bad thing, really, just something we need to tell you,” Keiko said as she sat down on the couch next to Miles. Julian glanced at them nervously. They’d discussed this and Miles had offered to tell Molly, but Keiko was right that it would be better if Julian could do it. It had taken a day or two for Julian to work up the courage, but this was a good time. Yoshi was asleep and probably would be for a few hours. Everyone had eaten dinner and it wasn’t so close to Molly’s bedtime yet that she would be getting cranky.

“Okay,” she said, although she looked wary. Julian dropped down to sit cross legged in front of her.

He was quiet for a moment, and Miles wasn’t sure if he was going to lose his nerve after all, but just as he was about to reach out a foot to nudge him, he took a deep breath.

“Do you know what DNA is, Molly?”

That wasn’t exactly where Miles would have started, but Julian was usually pretty good at keeping his explanations of things on Molly’s level when she asked questions, so this probably wasn’t going to get very technical. He hoped. Sometimes you never knew with Julian.

“Ummm. I don’t think so?”

“Okay. DNA helps make up our bodies.”

“You said our bodies were made up of cells”

“Yes, and they are. The DNA tells the cells how to be and it’s part of what makes us each different people. Your DNA says Molly is going to have brown hair and brown eyes and be this tall when she’s six and a bunch of other things that make you Molly. Make sense?”

“Yeah,” Molly nodded. “Does everyone have DNA?”

“Most everyone, yes.”

“Even Bajorans?”

“Even Bajorans.”

“Where’s it come from?” Miles silently willed Julian to not get too off track on this one.

“You get it from your parents. So some of your Mommy’s DNA and some of your Daddy’s DNA came together to make Molly DNA.”

Okay, that was probably safe enough, Miles thought. They’d given Molly the basics of how babies were made when Keiko had gotten pregnant with Yoshi, so she knew about the sperm and the egg at least.

“It came together in Mommy’s womb?”

“That’s right. It came together when you started to grow.”

Molly pondered this for a moment. “So Yoshi has DNA from Aunt Nerys? Because he grew in her womb?”

“No,” all of the adults said instantly. Not that it would be a problem if he did, but there had been enough rumors go around as it was without Molly telling people Yoshi had Kira’s DNA. .

“Yoshi is a special case. But his DNA is 100% human and absolutely DNA from your Mommy and Daddy,” Julian explained.

“Oh. Okay. Can you see it?”

“DNA? Yes. We can talk more about how it works later and maybe we’ll go look at some in my lab, how does that sound?”

“Good”

“Okay. We’ll do that another day. But the thing is, your DNA also tells your brain how to grow, like everything else in the body. And almost all of the time, your brain grows to be able to talk and walk and read and draw and understand things. Like your brain does.”

“Yoshi’s brain doesn’t,” she pointed out.

“Yoshi’s brain will. It’s just very new and it takes awhile for your brain to learn how to do these things. You didn’t talk and walk right away either, right?”

“Babies don’t talk.” she said with the withering ‘don’t you know anything?’ voice that six year olds get when an adult says something particularly obvious.

“Human babies don’t talk, that’s true.” Miles did reach out with a foot to gently nudge Julian in the back at this one. This was not the best time to get sidetracked into comparative xenobiology.

“At any rate,” Julian continued, “sometimes a person’s DNA tells their brain to grow differently than most people’s brains. So sometimes a person might have trouble learning to walk or talk. Or learning to read or write or do math. Sometimes a person’s brain might be different in how it hears things or sees things or feels things.”

“This isn’t a bad thing,” Keiko put in. “It’s just different, like everyone’s different from each other.”

“Right,” Julian said, and Miles hoped Molly hadn’t caught the tiny wobble in his voice. He took a deep breath. “My brain grew differently like that when I was little.”

“But you can talk and walk and read and all that,” Molly frowned.

“I can now. But I couldn’t very well when I was little. Your Mommy is right- that’s not a bad thing. However, some people don’t understand that it isn’t a bad thing and they…do things to try and make people’s brains work the same way theirs do.”

“Fixing what’s not broken,” Miles said. Julian glanced over at him, but didn’t react otherwise.

“Did someone try to make your brain work?” Molly asked.

Julian nodded. “My mom and dad didn’t…well, they decided it would be better if my brain worked more like most people’s. So, they took me somewhere where some doctors…did something to my DNA to change how my brain worked.” he said, very slowly.

Molly looked at him. “You can change DNA?”

“You can,” Julian said, a bit steadier. “However, we don’t let people do that in the Federation. It’s illegal.”

“Your brain is illegal?” she asked.

“Julian’s brain is not illegal. People can’t be illegal,” Keiko said firmly.

“No, but people can do illegal things, and my parents did an illegal thing to my DNA.”

“To make your brain better?”

“Different,” Julian said quickly. “To make my brain different.” Julian had indicated that he was most comfortable with framing it as a difference, rather than an improvement. Miles was happy to go with whatever he said as long as it wasn’t calling himself a freak or a monster. Keiko said they were going to have to work on the self-loathing. Miles wished her luck.  

“Did they get into trouble?”

“Eventually, yes. But, because of what my parents did, we had to keep it a secret for a long time.”

“Your Mommy and Daddy said you had to keep what happened secret?” she asked, looking alarmed. He and Keiko exchanged glances, unsure of exactly why keeping it a secret had caused Molly’s anxiety. She’d been fine up until this point.

“More or less, yes,” Julian said.

“But, but, that’s not a good secret!” Molly exclaimed.

Julian blinked. “I’m not sure I understand,” he said.

“Grownups shouldn’t never tell you to keep a secret from other grownups. Not unless it’s a good secret like birthday presents.”  Miles nodded. She had been getting the standard Federation safety and consent lessons for years now. Her alarm made sense now.

“Ah,” Julian said. “You are right. Grown ups should not ask you to keep things secret. Especially things that happen to your body.”

“So your mommy and daddy shouldn’t have done that! You’re supposed to tell a grown up if they do that.”

“I know,” Julian said. “And it wasn’t a good secret. But that’s what happened.”

“You didn’t tell?”

“I didn’t tell,” Julian said. “I couldn’t.”

“It’s okay,” Keiko said, to move it along. “Julian understands that adults shouldn’t ask kids to keep secrets and that wasn’t something his parents should have done.”

“Okay,” Molly said, relieved. Apparently, making sure Julian understood bad secrets was of vital importance. Well, she was six. Miles wasn’t altogether sure what she was really making of the rest of it, but he knew this was just the first conversation.

“Right,” Julian agreed. “But…someone found out this secret and because it is illegal, they had to tell Starfleet what happened.”

“They told on your Mommy and Daddy?” Molly said, dismayed.

“Yes. And on me, because I kept the secret when I joined Starfleet.” Julian said. “I wouldn’t have been allowed to be a doctor or be in Starfleet if people knew what had happened to me.”

“Because it’s illegal?”

“Because it’s illegal,” Julian agreed.

“But, that’s _lying_ ,” she said.

Julian nodded. “It was lying. And like most people who lie, eventually someone found out I was lying.”

“You’re _not supposed_ to lie.” Miles had to swallow a smile at the scandalized look on Molly’s face as Keiko nudged him. They’d have a good laugh later, but it would absolutely not help now.

“You’re right. I’m not. But I did,” Julian said, simply. They had discussed that Julian was not going to sugar coat what he had done. Julian had been adamant about it.

“Did you get in trouble?”

“Yes, because I shouldn’t have lied, but they decided it was okay for me to stay a doctor and in Starfleet.” Miles would have to follow up on that one. His understanding was Julian hadn’t been in trouble, but it wouldn’t be the first time he hadn’t gotten the full story out of Julian.

“So you’re still a doctor?”

“I am still a doctor.”

“And you’re still in Starfleet.”

“I am still in Starfleet.”

“Are you leaving DS9?” she asked, looking concerned.

“No, no. I am not going anywhere.” Julian shook his head. “No, sorry, honey, I wasn’t trying to tell you I was leaving. I am staying here.”

“Good,” Molly said firmly.

“We told you because some people might say…mean and untrue things about Julian now that they know his brain was changed,” Keiko explained. “We didn’t want you to be confused if you heard them. Nothing’s wrong with Julian. His brain is just different.”

“They fixed it, though,” Molly said, looking at him uncertainly.

“They made it so it was easier for me to learn things, but my brain is still different. It still works differently.” Which was something else Miles wanted to follow up on. They hadn’t really discussed exactly what Julian meant by “works differently” yet. He supposed it wasn’t his business, but he had a feeling that it would explain some things. Probably a lot of things.  

“Oh. Okay.”

“No one should be telling you anything about Julian or his brain,” Miles said, “because no one should be bringing kids into a grown up thing. But sometimes people don’t do what they should and sometimes people talk where kids can hear them. If someone does try to tell you something about Julian, you need to tell me or Mommy right away, though, because that’s like telling you to keep a bad secret.”

“Okay.”

“Do you have any other questions?” Julian asked tentatively,

“Did it hurt? When they did stuff to your brain?”

“Yes, some of it did.”

“Were you scared?”

“Yes, I was.”

“But you were little?”

“Yes, I was…pretty little.” They hadn’t discussed whether to tell Molly how old Julian had been, but it hadn’t escaped Miles that he had been almost exactly Molly’s age.

“Little like Yoshi?”

“No, no, I wasn’t a baby. But I was still a child.”

“Oh.” she pondered for a moment. “Can we do a puzzle?”

“Absolutely,” Julian said. Miles heard the relief in his voice. It had been pretty brave on his part to ask if Molly had any questions, honestly.

“Can it be a hard one?”

“Sure, honey,” Keiko said. “I think there’s enough time for a hard puzzle before your bedtime.”

“Okay!” she said, running off to retrieve her tablet with the puzzle program.

Julian closed his eyes and took a deep breath. “All right?” Miles asked, gently running his foot along Julian’s back.

“I think so.”

“Do the puzzle, we’ll get her to bed, and you can have a drink,” Miles promised. Julian smiled a bit crookedly, then turned to Molly who was choosing a puzzle for them to do.

 


End file.
